Until December 23, 2010, I was a city girl. I had daily lattes, shopped a little too often, relied on public transportation, and rejected the thought of ever living in the country. When my husband and I decided to leave it all for West Texas to farm, life changed completely. Read my “Farmwife Confessions” to learn about the transition.

One of the questions I get asked the most since moving to Texas is about what I do all day. Well, today was a fairly typical day: I worked my six hour work day, caught up on The Real Housewives of Orange County and Bethenny Ever After, played with my sweet dogs, enjoyed a beautiful day, worked on my cookbook, blogged, and just came home from a Williams family dinner to celebrate Russell’s grandfather’s birthday.

In so many ways, this is exactly the life I expected when Russell and I decided to move back to Texas. My life is considerably less stressful, slower paced, and more fun. Yet, there are so many aspects of this life that I just couldn’t have predicted or prepared myself for.

Adjusting to this new life is – I hope – helping me grow and I’m learning what it means to truly trust my husband. Previously, I had only thought of trust as it relates to monogamy, but I now understand that it means so much more than that. It’s trusting your mate to make good decisions in every walk of life, knowing that he’s fully capable and responsible.

When we got legally married last July, I had one request for the preacher, that he not tell me to submit to my husband. He technically followed my wishes, not mentioning that specific scripture. But, he did talk about trusting my new husband and following his lead. In the vows that he created for us, he had me promise to join with Russell to seek after OUR happiness.

Since I still don’t understand so much about farming and the farmer’s life, I’ve had to let go, adjust expectations, and learn to trust my husband to do what’s best for us and our future. This may not seem like much of a milestone – but for me, it certainly is. My parents raised me to be very independent – to be educated, to be able to make a good living, to be responsible for myself and my choices. Even in my relationship with Russell over the last 4.5 years, as our lives mixed and mingled, I still retained much of my independence. I still had my own friends, my own job, my own money, my own closet, my own everything. In fact, to this day, I still haven’t changed my name because I feel like it’s giving up too much of ME.

Now, we share almost everything, from finances to a closet. Shifting from ME to US, has been challenging at times, but I’m thankful that I have such a wonderful man to be my other half. It makes learning to trust that much easier. And maybe sometime soon, we’ll even share a last name.

1 Comment on Farmwife Confession: Learning to trust

  1. Kristin Murdock
    April 26, 2011 at 9:17 PM (7 years ago)

    This is great. I love that it is vulnerable and authentic. I applaud your journey from ME to US… I struggle with that regularly. I feel like once I got over the baggage behind the word “submission” and started to learn what it truly means {or at least what I believe it means in a healthy relationship} things became a bit more clear and it’s easier (sometimes) to willingly give the control to my loving husband.


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